Alt-Right KKK-Endorsed Deplorable Basket Doomsday Party
* Will make America great again
by getting rid of all non-white people, chaining women of child-bearing age to
the kitchen sink, taxing the poor to build up the Military-Industrial Complex
and then walling ourselves in while getting Mexico to pay for it.
* No one will try to harm us
because we’ll all be packing heat and have a closet full of fully automatic
assault rifles back at home.
* We will have all of the energy
we need because we’ll bring back oil and coal and any other fossil fuel we can
find and burn anything that’s flammable because we don’t believe in science,
global climate change is a myth and we’re all going to die anyway.
Vote for us because the other
candidate is a dangerous crook who should already be in prison.
Liberal-Progressive Sunshine Rainbow Coalition Fun-for-All Party
* Will give you everything you
ever wanted for free, including health care, education, food, shelter,
transportation, entertainment, a clothing allowance and a unicorn for the
little ones and invite the rest of the world to come here and share the wealth
while getting a few rich guys to pay for it.
* No one will try to harm us
because guns will be forbidden in this country, like they were in Tombstone,
Arizona, when the Earp brothers were in charge.
* We will have all of the energy
we need because we’ll build windmills on every hillside and solar power farms
on all flat land and then as soon as global warming causes the oceans to rise
we’ll build plants to convert all of that extra sea water into free
electricity.
Vote for us because the other
candidate is a dangerous crook who should already be in prison.
Any questions?
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